bread of heaven

i handle my doubt delicately
gently kneading it into
my faith
careful it doesn’t agitate the dough
too much 
because there’s still a hidden part of me
that fears overworked yeast
and a god who will decide
i’m not worth feeding
either heaven or salvation 

i mean
i don’t think doubt
will ruin the whole loaf
but what if it does
what if i am wrong
and this is the end
and i chose to follow the wrong recipe

will i be fed to birds
or burned in fire
or worse
will god spit me out
judged too tough and bitter
for a deity
who prides himself 
on making perfect
bread bodies
to be broken
for all of humanity